Media in Trouble: All the news thats UNfit to print!: Prediction Biden '08

"The information of the people at large can alone make them safe, as they are the sole depositary of our political and religious freedom." --Thomas Jefferson 1810

Monday, June 20, 2005

Prediction Biden '08

Wha?! Grumble, pffst.

Whoa! OK Friday was my birfday. In an unlikely turn of events, a drastic illness overcame me. It was a nasty bug, it forced me to call out of work. I had heard about this bug before and as such I made a decision to well, go get some fresh sea air. I heard this is the only cure for such an ailment. For the salty sea breeze contains molecular structures which render such diseases harmless. I think I had read this before. Also, I had heard that fishing poles, tackle boxes, and bait fish tend to increase the effectivity of the salty sea breeze molecular conduits of health. I would have confirmed this with a doctor however, knowing that the fishing equipment is useless unless you get to the spot earlier than the fish wake up, there was no way I could have waited for the doctor's office to open up.

Either way, after that I had a bit of a fiesta at the abode which included beirut aka beer pong (a fun filled game typically enjoyed by students in universities everywhere). This also included BBQ coors light anal chicken (a recipe which includes sticking a can of beer up a chicken's ass and then putting it on the grill for an hour). I must say, this is an ecellent way of cooking a chicken.

There was more fishing, cleaning, and then walking of dogs. In short the birthday weekend became quite the fun time I was not really expecting it to be.

In either case, I did watch the sunday funnies and whilst Atrios seemingly beat me to it. I wanted to predict that Joe Biden is making a bid for 2008 like no problem and he may be a better choice then Hillary. Why? Well Biden is a man. Thats why. Easy Feminist readers. This is not because I don't want a woman president. This is because the red state loonies who think a ball of cells is Nature's screwy way of containing a God created soul think that a girl can't possibly lead an army. And leadin a armay is what we need in this new age of terra.

So. I boldly and unfortunately predict today June 20th, that Joe Biden will be the Democratic Nominee in 2008 (no matter what we little bloggers think we can do). He is a man, he has white hair, looks statesman, and hes from Delaware. Not quite North East, and definitely not a Liberal. He will be the "get us out of Iraq, with a victory, in less than a year" candidate. And that may be enough to win the nomination. He also has learned his lesson when it comes to staying with his party if one of them talks smack.

For instance, Biden was the guy on Face the Nation this weekend. When asked about Dick Durbin the Communist pig fucker he said this:
Sen. BIDEN: Look, I spoke to Dick Durbin yesterday. He told me he's written a letter where he points out that in the letter that there was inappropriate comparisons. He wished he hadn't made them, and he understands that that went beyond the point he was trying to make. But the point he was making was an accurate point about we need to do something about Guantanamo, that we can't leave it sitting in the status quo the way it is now. And as far as the majority leader asking him to apologize, I don't think that's a wise place for the majority leader to go. You know, I mean, if you're going to start talking about apologies I haven't heard him apologize for the Schiavo case, and quite frankly I don't think it matters. I think the matter is what do we do now? What do we do now about Guantanamo, and I think that's what Senator Durbin is now focused on.

So he basically he may have heard about us down here in bloglandia that chastized him for calling Dean a communist pig fucker just a few weeks ago.

So he is training himself for being OK in the bases eyes (fat chance), while at the same time talking truth to power, being one of the few members of congress with a son or daughter actually in the military, and putting forth a decent get us out of iraq idea. Although I don't think Biden's idea for the Euphrates will bode well amongst environmentalists:We had $18.7 billion--or $4 billion. Remember that big fight almost two years ago now?
We've only sent out $6 billion of it in projects. It's going to be 117 degrees in heat. Let these military guys like Webster who does the 3rd ID, give him PVC pipe to hook up to the back of houses and run the sewage into the river instead of two feet of sewage in the front steps. You know, there's 40 percent unemployment. As Dick Lugar said, a former mayor of Indiana and the straightest guy I know, `There needs to be a little walking around money here. Go out in the village and hire the chief and say, "Build this dirt word. Put these people"'--this is important stuff now, now, now, now.

Aall this and he has a penis. Oh and he's white too, but I thought that was a given. I mean if the red staters ain't gonna want no woman fightin da war on terra, they damned well ain't gonna have no black person neither.

Gather all of this plus the fact that he actually is the first to announce he is actually running for president:
Sen. BIDEN: My intention is to seek the nomination. I mean, I know I'm supposed to be more coy with you. I know I'm supposed to tell you, you know, that I'm not sure. But if, in fact, I think, that I have a clear shot at winning the nomination by this November, December, then I'm going to seek the nomination. If I conclude that I'm not likely to be able to win the nomination, then I'm going to figure out who to support.

So I predict that should the focus groups take a gander at all the folks making the sunday talk circuit, and Biden's "get the sewage/get us out of iraq" narrative dominates, then he will be the Democrat nominee come 2008. And the dark world of Republican presidencies will persist for yet another 8 years.

And it is all because they have the uncanny ability to make light of very heavy situations. Like this for example!